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Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Open Journal

I appreciated the comments that some of you left on yesterday's post. And I have to agree that I like the images and generally like the feel of the lines. But I don't think there's enough there yet to call it a poem. There are some possibilities but no way to bring them to life. That means the sentiments remain private--between the speaker and his/her love. In that equation, there's no room (or there's too much room) for the reader. And there's no way in to the poet's vision.

The thrust of this fragment is toward a statement on art and passion. But the lines have no context. And without context, as plesant as they might be, they become cliche. The poet needs to push them beyond that to make them push -- or invite -- the reader to participate in the making of meaning. [Music is the purest art form (or perhaps it's dance), and poetry is the art of meaning.]

So where does that leave me as the poet. Sometimes changing one or two words can make all the difference. It didn't tonight. My sense is this IS a fragment. It's a part of something bigger. And I have a sense of a good poem coming on.


  1. When I was in collage one of my weakest courses was Literature. I never could quite get poems. The professor said I was too logical in my approach.

    Having said that, yesterday when I read this it reminded me of different parts of each day. From morning to afternoon then to evening, then night. So what I got from this piece was the beauty of each part of the day. Way off I'm guessing. As usual where poetry is concerned.

    Have a terrific day. :)

  2. Beautiful G...your poems are just perfect to me the way you present them...

    Anything else is just above my head sorry, literature (copying that word from Sandee) wasn't even close to being my best subject or even okay subject. My best subject of course was study hall

  3. This poem reminds me of an Irish hymn my Grandma used to sing.

    Thanks for sharing.

  4. "poetry is the art of meaning."


  5. I love the beginning now! Just love it!

  6. This is absolutely lovely. That last line is SO romantic. ((sigh))

  7. Hi, Sandee. I once had a professor in a poetry workshop course tell me the problem with my poetry is that I think too much. I think you were absolutly on target with your response to the poem. I truly appreciate your comments.

    I did pretty good in study hall, too, Darsden. My favorite, though was detention. A lot of cool kids were there. Thanks for reading what I write.

    Hi, Rae. I'd like to know more about that Irish hymn.

    Aloha, Cloudia. And thank you for that.

    Hi, Rosni, It's kind of amazing how much a single word can change an image. Thank you.

    Hi, Willow. Some of us live by romance. Thank you for your comment.